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--- Major Rant (http://www.gatchamania.net/threadid.php?threadid=4838)
Posted by Daniella T on 28-03-2015 at 22:52:
Dear Ame, I m very very sorry to read about your troubłes. You deserve to rant! Just wanted to echo what the others said -- look after yourself first! Keep us posted and lots of hugs sent your way!
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Posted by Springie on 30-03-2015 at 03:08:
Amethyst...you are in my thoughts and prayers...so much going on with you! Hope you get a break soon!
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Posted by amethyst on 30-03-2015 at 03:27:
The project work is done. Over the weekend DS and the scouts built two picnic tables, rebuilt two benches and two trash can covers for a new city park. So now all that remains is the paperwork. So this is one less thing on my plate, the rest of this is on DS, though I do have pictures for him and the troop, and printing for the project.
The rest will hopefully calm down some soon, too.
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Posted by k2p2 on 30-03-2015 at 11:44:
keeping you in my thoughts Ame...
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Posted by ChrisW on 30-03-2015 at 12:40:
Yay for one big thing off the list!
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Posted by amethyst on 15-04-2015 at 04:19:
Just when I thought things might be looking up....
DH has been sick since Friday with vertigo and nausea
Yesterday I learned that my mother is in the early stages of renal failure, we see a nephrologist on Thursday to see what is up with that
My son's recruiter came by this afternoon, DS needs to wait a year or two before enlisting due to his history of asthma, so now we get to frantically work on plan b, finding the right CC for him
And this evening I learned that my uncle has lung cancer
All I can think at the moment is stop this life! I want to get off! I'll catch the next one!
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Perspective Alters Reality
Posted by Kritter on 15-04-2015 at 04:22:
Oh man, never rains but it pours. Hugs to you. :
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Posted by ChrisW on 15-04-2015 at 17:45:
Oh man Amethyst. That really is a shitstorm of stuff (I'd say pardon the swearing but that deserves some swearing). I know all too well how hard it is to take care of yourself with all of that kind of stuff going on all around you but please find a way to work that in somewhere. You can't help other people with their oxygen masks unless you do your own.
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Posted by Reboekah on 15-04-2015 at 23:46:
Hugs Ame -
We're here for you - rant all you need, and reach out! We're here with shoulders...
Same with you CW!
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Bird Scramble OE
155 issues - 36.5Years! - and flying high!
Posted by Springie on 16-04-2015 at 04:37:
Wow, Amethyst...you are going through so much! I hope all of those issues get resolved with the best possible outcomes. You certainly deserve a break!
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Posted by Becky Rock on 16-04-2015 at 23:43:
Lots of hugs Ame. I hope the rainbow after the storm shows up soon.
What does your son want to study? A lot of the CCs have agreements with other state 4 year schools for transfers after 2 years. Its a cheaper way to get your 4 year degree as the degree comes from the 4 year school with no mention of the CC.
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Posted by amethyst on 17-04-2015 at 06:29:
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Engineering of some form. Since his rejection is not permanent , at this point he wants to study and then try again in a year or two. I'd like to see him get his AA/AS first, but that'll be his choice.
So far stage 3 is what is happening. The specialist said mom is in stage 3 renal failure due to diabetes. Which means she has one more doctor to see regularly to go along with the other two, but fortunately that seems to be it so far.
Not sure what to think of the doctor, he seems like a great doc, but he reminds me too much of Curtis Armstrong to take him seriously.
My uncle's cancer is also at stage 3. They need to do a biopsy still, but believe it can be treated with chemo and radiation. I'll be going down to see him sometime this weekend.
DH goes back to work tomorrow, he is climbing the walks (a good sign), but he's not sure if he can handle a full day yet.
Thank you all for your thoughts. It is nice to have this somewhat anonymous place to rant and vent, without feeling like someone will get bent out of shape for what was said. My cousin posted on Facebook, which probably wasn't the best move she could have made, and her brother and sister got upset. He wasn't going to tell his kids, which I might understand if they were little, but the baby is 25!
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Perspective Alters Reality
Posted by ChrisW on 17-04-2015 at 18:03:
It sounds like things are feeling more manageable at least! I'm glad that you're able to get stuff off your chest, it is really nice to be able to post stuff without family getting upset for sure.
At least your son has a decent backup plan in getting started with his studies. 
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Posted by amethyst on 18-04-2015 at 02:53:
Yeah, he's got the plan but he's hedging on colleges.
Speaking of having a place to get things off your chest, for lack of a better place to put this, I'll just add it my issues.
This one doesn't affect me, but it does make my heart ache.
I just learned that an acquaintance committed suicide yesterday. What hurts is he has three daughters, the eldest a senior in my son's class, the middle a sophomore in my daughter's class, and the youngest, several years younger, I don't know her. The older are beautiful girls, smart, athletic, and active in the community. I know what it is like to lose a parent, but I can't imagine what these girls are going through. I keep thinking of the oldest, a month away from prom and graduation a few weeks after that, and her father couldn't hold on long enough to see her through those. I think of my daughter's friend and teammate, a straight A student, and can only hope this doesn't set her grades spiraling.
I know many consider suicide a sin, but it know this man was disabled and left in a lot of pain. I've watched him push through it for more than ten years. Recently, he was injured again. I can only wonder at how much worse he must of been, how depressed he must have become to feel that he could not hold for his family, that they would be better off without his burden.
Thank you for letting me put this here. Being from such a small community, I don't want to put this on FB, it is not my place.
My kids are in a bit of shock and so am I. My son is taking it out through video games, my daughter is out walking through vineyards or down to the river, and I'm posting here as I process this.
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Perspective Alters Reality
Posted by Kritter on 18-04-2015 at 05:35:
Just when you think you've got it bad something like this comes up. I'm so sorry for his loss. I've been through the suicide of a close friend and a more acquaintance type friend and both times did not see it coming. It did bring things back into perspective for me though. You never know what internal demons someone is fighting. Hopefully things will improve for you soon. I have a coworker who was supposed to be going into the air force as a commissioned officer after his college graduation back in December and his activation date ha been pushed back 3 times now. He's in this horrible limbo where he can't get a full time job because he is supposed to be called up in a month but they may or may not push the date back again in the mean time he still needs to pay his bills. Military life is rough. Could he do ROTC at the community college so might get officer status when he does go in?
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Posted by ChrisW on 18-04-2015 at 20:10:
Oh no Amethyst. 
I'm so sorry.
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Eagle Whisperer
Posted by Becky Rock on 19-04-2015 at 00:48:
I've always thought of suicide as selfish, as the person doesn't take into consideration how they are going to scar their entire family and friends for the rest of their lives, but I can't speak to a situation where the individual is in so much pain they can't take it anymore.
I hope the girls have strong friends who will stick by them.
My best friend in high school tried to OD on drugs. She had physically and mentally abusive alcoholic parents. I tried to help her as much as possible. She even lived with us every once in a while, but I had no idea she was going to try to kill herself. I felt so stupid and I was sooooo angry with her at first. I know she had it bad but she had me and my family. My parents had stepped in on her behalf several times and even offered to foster her, but instead she'd tried to OD.
My family has several members in the police force. Once I got over my shock, my anger turned towards the source. I found out who at school had sold her the drugs and informed my father and brother, who arranged a bust. They weren't there for it so there would be no tie to me for safety reasons. The bitch (sorry but I still think of her in that way as she had been selling to a lot of other kids at the school), was caught with all kinds of stuff on her.
Getting her behind bars made me feel a lot better.
Linda survived, got better, got declared independent at 17, graduated HS and got a degree in pediatric nursing. We still exchange Christmas cards.
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Posted by ChrisW on 19-04-2015 at 01:34:
Suicide is a complicated issue. People can be in so much emotional pain and in such an altered state from it that it can really feel like the only answer. That was a good response, to get that drug dealer dealt with rather than let her continue.
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