I was trawling through some archived files and I found this, which was saved from the buffer of the Gatchamaniacs Gather talker after a particularly silly session one weekend many years ago. Contributors (those to whom blame may justly be apportioned) were Yours Truly, Bobkat, Lew, Dei, Pintail and Tracy. The NTT references hark back to that commercial campaign for a Japanese telco that had a pop group dressed as the Gatchaman characters. Their version of Katse had gigantic teeth. Gatchacollege Curriculum for the coming semester: How to catch the G-Member of your Dreams The Asakura Driving School (Courtesy of Wendy and Katharine) How to go into Fiery Phoenix Mode and not throw up How to Survive An Exploding Date 101 (facilitator J Asakura) How to tell if the woman of your dreams is an enemy agent? Emotional Suppression For Parents (Advanced Course) - Facilitator Security Chief Anderson The art of telling off a G-2 and living to tell about it How to Tell Who Your Friends Are By Cooking For Them - facilitator Swan Jun Spectran Botany (men only) The Care And Feeding of Large Invertebrates - facilitator Keyop Jigokiller Topiary - facilitator Ken Washio (attendees will be required to provide their own gasoline) How to recognize different Galactor mecha from a very long way away: Number one. Cataroller. Cataroller Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus, and Vice Versa - facilitator Berg Katse Beginning Hairstyling - facilitator OAV Katse Creating the perfect Space Burger Highdiving - facilitator OAV Jun (and not float in the water) Galactor Recruitment for Amway Distributors - facilitator Berg Katse Coping With Buoyancy - facilitator OAV Jun 2+2 can equal 5: Courtesy of the ISO scientific group Anger Management - facilitator Joe Asakura Large Scale Homicide for Fun and Profit - facilitator J Asakura Does not Compute - 7-Zark-7 Your New Career in Phone Sex - facilitator Susan From Planet Pluto Languages: Understanding your pet robotic dog Creative Optometry - facilitator Kozaburo Nambu with guest lecturer Security Chief Anderson How to Dress for Success - facilitator OAV Nambu Gravity Defying Hair: OAV Nambu Nerds Can Date Too - facilitator OAV Ken Underwear Modelling 101 - OAV Joe Creative Architecture - facilitator 7-Zark-7 (destroy your base and keep it, too!) Identifying Enemy Agents Through Beverage Selection - facilitator G-1 Mark The Absent Parent - facilitator Red Impulse with guest lecturer Col. Cronus Finding Your Inner Voice - facilitator G-4 Keyop So, Your Sibling Is A Megalomaniac - facilitator Mala of Spectra Animal Fetishism for Fun and Profit - facilitator Berg Katse with guest lecturer Zoltar of Spectra Zoological Nomenclature - facilitator Jameson Brewer How to speak in Morse Code - facilitator Keyop Curative Centrifuging: Kozaburu Nambu Experimental centrifugal physics - triage 101 Biomedical Applications For Everyday Kitchen Appliances - K. Nambu Fun with feathers - J. Asakura Maintaining Contact with Your Inner Child: Gel Sadora Speaking to Bore - facilitator Ken Washio, guest Ace Goodheart Maniacal Laughter 101: Berg Katse, guest speaker Zoltar Decimate Your Way To Fame And Fortune - facilitator Berg Katse Dating for Busy Ninjas: Princess Creative Napping - facilitator Tiny Harper Note: bring your own chairs Transplanting ancient works of art for fun - facilitator Zoltar Destroying Enemy Bases With the Right Side of the Brain - facilitator G-1 Mark Bathroom Exhibitionism 101 - facilitator OAV Joe Advanced Hairstyling: OAV Ryu How to Get the Male Attention You Crave - facilitator OAV Jun When not to use the cable - Jason Surviving Migraine - facilitator G-2 Jason Stranger Danger - joint facilitators G-3 and G-4 Surviving Your Team - G-3 Ping Pong Predictability - facilitators G-1 Mark and G-2 Jason Conversations with Dog - 7-Zark-7 The Tao of Zark - facilitators Mark and Princess Catching razor-sharp objects without personal harm - Ken Washio Relationship Avoidance - facilitator Ken Washio Ping Pong Predictability - facilitators G-1 Mark and G-2 Jason Sound as a Weapon - Mark Drumming For Revenge - Keyop Advanced Bomb Selection: Joe Asakura, guest lecturer OAV Jun Space Travel Without A Ship - facilitator G-2 Jason Advanced yo-yo skills : Bring your own yo-yo (no explosives!) Off Road (and On-Mecha) Driving - G-2 Jason with guest lecturer Joe Asakura The Weapons in Your Make-Up Kit - facilitator G-3 Princess Chicken Soup for the Alien's Soul - Sosai X UFOlogy - facilitator Susan from Planet Pluto Racing stripes can be sexy - facilitator Mala, guest speaker Katse Negotiating with Enemy Children: Galactor How Not To Pick Up Women On Trains - facilitator Chief Anderson with guest lecturer J Asakura How to Dump Women on Trains - facilitator G-1 Mark with guest lecturer K Washio How to paint secret destruct buttons red - Katse Creative mecha captain costumes - Galactor Fighting for Cowards - Various Galactor Captain guest speakers Goo IS a weapon - facilitator Ryu Taking care of hairpieces (required for all new Galactor hires) Rationalising the Irrational 101 - facilitator G-1 mark Coping with Rationalising the Irrational -facilitator G-2 Jason When your ship looks like poultry and you are replaced by a bubble gum machine - facilitator Ryu G5 Job security through Insubordination Avoiding the Truancy board: Guest speaker, Jimpei G-4 Anthropology - Chicken Worship in Advanced Civilisations (requisite for Degree students) Monosyllabic literature: OAV Joe Drugs for Fighting: NTT Joe Rationalise Your Way Through the Military - facilitator G-1 Mark Dental Care and Your Health - NTT Katse Exploding Irony - NTT Jun Coping - When your father dies / comes back to life / dies / comes back to life - facilitator G1 Mark Posture Perfect: NTT Ken Advanced Death-Cheating: Col. Cronus Creative Dying - Getting it Right the 'n'th time - Col. Cronus Kooky undercover costumes - facilitators Ryu and Jinpei, guest speaker Katse Owl prefer blondes - Tiny Sculpture through Jet Blasts: Ken Quip Your Way Through A Crisis - facilitator J-4 Keyop with special guest lecturer G-2 Jason Bird Missiles - Phallic symbols or tools of destruction? - Katse Explosives and Your Self Esteem - facilitator G-3 Princess Vengeance for Idiots: OAV Joe Detonate Your Way to Empowerment - facilitator G-3 Princess Reintepreting Rules For Fun And Profit: Jason Balancing glasses on your nose - facilitators Nambu and Anderson The Big Red Button - Power Play and Grappling - facilitators G-1 and G-2 Delusions of Grandeur - facilitator 7 Zark 7 [list][/list]

This one was my favorite Jigokiller Topiary - facilitator Ken Washio (attendees will be required to provide their own gasoline)