This was one of the articles in the Brisbane newspaper "The Courier Mail" today. Promise - not EVERYTHING in Australia will kill you. Some will make you wish you were dead instead! SJ - hope this makes you homesick! (working on a theory - if she gets homesick enough, she will pack up her boys and move back here). Dangerous animals keep tourists at bay

Oh, good Lord! Madilyn, that is priceless! It brought back the memory of a friend of mine (American) telling me about his trip down under to participate in one of the shared military training exercises they do in the Outback. The lecture on the proper decorum required by the personnel lasted 10 minutes. The rest of the 3 hour session was devoted to what critters and creatures were deadly - just in the area they would be training in. The guy actually ran out of time so he left them with 'If it moves and it's not human, kill it before it kills you.'

Well you know Maddy you are Queenslander and that place is crawling with the worst of them waiting to jump on unsuspecting tourists! Crocodiles and few usavoury jelly fish floating around...and then throw in a shark or two...along with a red belly black snake, king browns.... Although we do have few sharks along the coast of NSW just waiting to munch on a few tourists....and of course Blue bottles on the beaches!!! The only real one at the moment I'm having trouble with are red back spiders in the backyard and two toddlers and want to play with em...sigh!! My kids LOVE Bindy the jungle girl!!!! My 2yr old drew a black snake the other day after watching Bindy.... That was good article, thanks for sharing! Green; "ROTFL!!!! One of our friends used to train with US troops that were sent out here in the outback bases, and I recall him mentioning the same kinda thing when they were about to head out...generally that was his advice at times too...

Ahh Queensland. Yes, we do have more critters that'll kill ya than anywhere else in Australia. Fair's fair though - we DO post warnings about Irukanji Jellyfish, Marine Stingers and Crocs. Not our fault tourists think that we're joking! Important note for American and German tourists - when the sign says "Do not swim here" it means it. Usually because there are very large saltwater crocs there. Why American and German? Well, statistically they seem to be the ones who ignore the signs! At the moment in Queensland, however, we are having most problems with Sudanese migrants who can't swim thinking that they can swim in dangerous water. In the last month, we have had 3 drownings - one in a flooded creek and two others swimming outside the flags. The really sad thing about the beach drownings is that their friends said tht they knew to swim between the flags, but chose not to. Just goes to prove - you can't save people from themselves! Of course, if you want to read more about just how confusing Australia is (and how dangerous), try this article: Australia: The Confusing Country Many people think that this was written by Douglas Adams, but it was written by a contributor to the HG2G website

I've read that one before and still I love it! It does have more than a touch of truth in it...

These are great, Madilayn! Oddly enough, I'd still like to visit Australia though. I've also heard that it's a bad idea in Australia to flip down the windshield visor in your car while you're driving, lest you cause some nasty creature to fall into your lap. Is that true?

It is, LB. But it's the same as checking the toilet seat before sitting on it, or pulling back the sheets of your bed before getting in. You either do it or you don't. I must admit I just flip the visor down without thinking about it and in the 20 or so years that I've been driving I've never had something nasty drop into my lap. I do check the toilet seat though. And pull back the sheets. And turn my clothes inside out before washing them so I have to turn them the right way round before putting them on. And flick the towel before using it. And bang my shoes before putting them on. No, I don't have a complusive disorder - I'm just an Australian!

Wow, I'm amazed we survived our trip to Australia! We stayed along the East coast, though.

Having have read all this I'm asking myself if my enthusiasm to visit Australia is apt to change! I have an uncle who lives at Melbourne but I don't think he had ever encountered such problems in the past decades! I might ask for his advice before I make plans for a possible future visit! Madilayn, as regards to immigrants, here at Malta we have the same problem! At the moment we are getting literally invaded as they try to reach Sicily. My DH always tells me that it is because of ignorance that their mortality rate by drowning is so high. But, it's also because of the vessels they are obliged to use which are not so adequate in rough waters.

Originally posted by lborgia88 These are great, Madilayn! Oddly enough, I'd still like to visit Australia though. I've also heard that it's a bad idea in Australia to flip down the windshield visor in your car while you're driving, lest you cause some nasty creature to fall into your lap. Is that true?

Last summer I casually flipped down my windshield visor and staring medirectly in the face was a HUGE Huntsman spider. Honestly I think the person beside me and behind me nust have thought some crazy woman was driving the car when I freaked out trying to get rid of the thing and being a Swan flapping around about a spider...and they're not even dangerous, just huge. Gatchamarie; Don't worry you just have to be aware thats all not to play with the widllife, they don't make good pets!

Yeah, thanks for posting that Ebony. Huntsmen are the only spider I don't deal well with looking at - they look back, and they have more eyes than I do! Gatchamarie, inspite of this discussion thread Australia is quite safe - if you respect the wildlife! The southern areas are the least infested, so if you were to visit your uncle in Melbourne you shouldn't encounter too much. Just beware of spiders, don't go near snakes, swim between the flags at the beaches, listen out for shark warnings, don't touch that pretty little octopus that is turning neon blue, wear thongs in the water, watch out for wasps (but you would already know about them, wouldn't you?) and if there is a sign saying don't do something - do NOT, under any circumstances, ignore it! And for all my fellow Aussies out there, you will notice I didn't attach a warning about drop bears.

WOw, that's some spider, Ebony!

I haven't seen a huntsman for a while, but I think thats because my cat chases them. Its the red back spiders that have been the problem of late. They aren't so good and its the reason I haven't got a sandpit for the girls to play in. They love hide under things like ledges, and in boots. Under pot plants. I check the cubbyhouse everyday before the kids can play in there just incase.

And that is not an overly large specimen either, TJ. I've been bitten by the ordinary black house spiders (which are nasty) a couple of times and while Huntsmen aren't poisonous, I would rather see eight of the black ones than one of these sitting on the wall... And the sprays just don't kill them - it's a magazine, telephone book or cricket bat job....

Ebony, I haven't seen a redback in a while (not including SA's cricket team, of course, oh my, aren't we getting thrashed? sob). We've been having problems with the whitetails... Summer certainly brings out the wildlife, doesn't it?

Here in the States we have Brown Recluse spiders. They're small but pack a wollop. The bite area can ulcerate and cause blood poisoning. And Black Widows. I was bitten by a Brown while living in Germany. It had gotten in my bed and bit me on the right leg below my knee while I slept. Got bitten again last summer down at the In-Law's in Georgia in the same way but on the back of my left thigh. Wasn't fun and have the scars to prove it. I've always wanted to visit Australia, dangerous animals or not!

You all know that there are plenty of us Gatchamaniacs around the country and you are welcome to visit! Re Huntsmen & spider deaths - a friend of mine (big boofy sufer dude) has a massive spider phobia - he uses baygon plus a lighter and tries flameing them to death! It is rather spectacular Ahh cricket. We're flogging the Pakistani's at the moment in the tests - and Queensland seems to be flogging everybody in the Big Bash! If we win tonight's match then the final will be in Brissy

Becky, they've found Brown Recluses here too... Yes, Madilyn, we know you lot are flogging the rest of us! It's alright, AFL will start up soon and we'll see what happens then, shall we? Lol

I'm realizing now what a comparatively safe childhood I had in Nova Scotia! No poisonous snakes, no poisonous (or unusually large) spiders -heck, there isn't even poison ivy. Nothing in the lakes or ocean any worse than leeches, or jellyfish that can make your skin sting a little bit for about 10 minutes.

Yeah, we have jellyfish too.... And yep, it can kill ya....

Ahh - but lborgia - you have that snow stuff that comes in copious quantities that also brings below freezie weather.

Ebony ... if it were me on whom that spider would have dropped I would have not just scared the other drivers but only God knows what I would have done! Green ... if ever I decide to visit Australia I will surely abide with your warnings! I'm sure that apart from these facts, Australia is one of the most wonderful places on Earth ... that's how people who have already visited it tend to describe it! I can say that I am lucky to live in a place where there aren't so much wildlife scares! We only have jellyfish infestations during summers, especially the last one ... and the one or two harmful mosquitoes! I think that's why I like so much to visit zoos, marine and wildlife parks when I'm abroad ... because of the lack of knowledge of such creatures!

Originally posted by Madilayn Ahh - but lborgia - you have that snow stuff that comes in copious quantities that also brings below freezie weather.

Oh, God, yes! Give me the spiders, snakes and sharks! You can keep your snow!

[quote]Originally posted by Madilayn You all know that there are plenty of us Gatchamaniacs around the country and you are welcome to visit! Thanks for the invite! Have to start saving... Re Huntsmen & spider deaths - a friend of mine (big boofy sufer dude) has a massive spider phobia - he uses baygon plus a lighter and tries flameing them to death! It is rather spectacular I've got a male childhood friend who is terrified of spiders. If he saw one, he would literally scream and climb up onto the tallest rhing he could find, flapping his arms like he's trying to fly away. I always thought it'd be funny to have Jason have arachnophobia. Big, bad Condor reduced to a baby by a tiny spider - no offense to those who are afraid of spiders. I don't mind as long as they're small enough to squash under my shoe and don't chase you, which I understand some dangerous spiders do.

Has anyone ever seen pictures of the camel spiders? Some of them are two feet long.

Originally posted by Madilayn Ahh - but lborgia - you have that snow stuff that comes in copious quantities that also brings below freezie weather.

Originally posted by green Oh, God, yes! Give me the spiders, snakes and sharks! You can keep your snow!

But we need the cold and the snow in Nova Scotia -otherwise we'd have blackflies and mosquitoes biting us all year round!

It sounds as bad as Pandora, doesnt it?

Originally posted by green And that is not an overly large specimen either, TJ. I've been bitten by the ordinary black house spiders (which are nasty) a couple of times and while Huntsmen aren't poisonous, I would rather see eight of the black ones than one of these sitting on the wall... And the sprays just don't kill them - it's a magazine, telephone book or cricket bat job....

. I general resort to the rolled newspaper...cricketbats leave dents in the walls and the spider got away!

Originally posted by green

Originally posted by Madilayn Ahh - but lborgia - you have that snow stuff that comes in copious quantities that also brings below freezie weather.

Oh, God, yes! Give me the spiders, snakes and sharks! You can keep your snow!

I second that!!!

Originally posted by Ebonyswanne

Originally posted by green And the sprays just don't kill them - it's a magazine, telephone book or cricket bat job....

. I general resort to the rolled newspaper...cricketbats leave dents in the walls and the spider got away!

I once had a huntman on my car while I was parked outside a friend's house. I asked her to get me something to brush it off with, thinking along the lines of a newspaper, and she brought out a cricket bat... Guess I should have remembered she was petrified of spiders....

Green; I had this image of a person sitting in a car staring at the spider...Fear washing over their face...then it turns to pertified upon seeing this person emerge with a cricket bat taking aim at the spider and forgetting about the person in the car.... The person gulps...and then figures she'll take her chances with the spider and starts up the car.....

.... I don't mind as long as they're small enough to squash under my shoe and don't chase you, which I understand some dangerous spiders do.

Funnel web spiders (the most venomous spider on earth) will not just chase you it will jump up at you and sink its massive fangs (capable of penetrating fingernails or soft shoes) into your calf and inject its acidic, multiple toxin laced venom into your leg whereon you will experience nausea, vomiting, sweating, difficulty berating, twitching, disorientation, fluid accumulation on the lungs, coma then a horrible death either through low blood pressure, asphyxiation or swelling of the brain. That would probably spoil your holidays.

Thanks for the info. Are they hairy or hard shelled? Just so I know what to avoid like the plague.

They are nasty, no doubt about it. Of course more people have died due to a shark attack than a funnel web spider bite since they developed the antivenom... It appears only the males are likely to aggressively attack, so if you do happen across one you have 50-50 chance of getting away! Becky, there are some very detailed pictures available on the net if you are really interested in knowing what to look out for. Of course, we just tend to kill any 8 legged creatures we come across - saves the time of thinking 'Is that dangerous? Does it have a stripe? Oh, wait - it's Australia and it's a spider! Where's my shoe?'

Maybe that's why Galactor never attacked Australia! That, and the badass ANZACs who'd hand them their asses without even breaking a sweat.

Yeah all they need to do is introduce the mecha to local wildlife...Oh boy I see the Crocodile mecha coming from a mile away!!!!

Originally posted by UnpublishedWriter Maybe that's why Galactor never attacked Australia! That, and the badass ANZACs who'd hand them their asses without even breaking a sweat.

That would depend on their targets. I can imagine it now.... Ministerial Aide: "Oh, look. They've destroyed the Sydney Opera House. That's a shame." Prime Minister: "That means work for our construction companies." Aide: "There goes the bridge. The commuters aren't going to like that much." Prime Minister: "The ferry companies will. More work for them." Aide: "Oh, that's sad - that was the cricket grounds! We were doing so well too." Prime Minister: "We'll beat the Poms next year, don't worry." Aide: "Was that the brewery???" Prime Minister: "OMG - NOT the brewery!!! Launch an all out attack!!!"

Green: love it!! Though - they might have a problem with the cricket ground going - especially since they also use it for football (all types) as well. Oops - good job not attacking Brisbane - there is Suncorp Stadium (football - the cricket ground is at the Gabba - other side of town) and the XXXX Brewery next to it... Thank heavens Arnotts moved, or the Tim Tams could also have been threatened in one hit! About a year ago, there was a discussion on Galactor and Australia on the BotP list. I had a plotpuppy and sent this in: The truth is they came, they landed, they had a series of problems. 1. Mecha landed on a bull ant nest. Not immediately noticed until the ants made it inside. Goons covered in bites. 2. Reconasaince party sent outside and met some wildlife. One got kicked in the goolies by a kangaroo. Second one had a drop bear fall on his head. Third one was tragically killed when he inadvertently put his hand down a wombat hole and the wombat got frightened, sat on his hand and crushed it, then collapsed the burrow on the crushed hand and arm. Goon died of embarrasment as he couldn't bear to explain what had happened. 3. Goon found outisde dunny. Got bitten by the Red Back on the toilet seat. 4. Goon tried to pet snake. Silly goon. 5. Captain du Jour went swimming in a lovely billabong in the top end. Discovers that in Australia "Crocs" don't mean shoes...... Croc later had to be treated for indigestion. 6. Katse decided to leave Australia alone after he tried vegemite. Lesson learned: don't put it on your toast thickly. You only need a tiny scraping on it if you're a beginner. You need to be hardened to Vegemite to be able to put it on your toast at any level of thickness! 7. ON leaving, Katse ony just makes it out alive after making disparaging remarks about Australian sporting prowess. Mecha is severely damaged by accurately hit cricket balls and footy players going for the tackle and/or mark. Galactor puts Australia on it's "do not got there" list.

Madilyn, I love it! So true!!! I did think there might be a problem with the cricket ground, until I realised it isn't footy season yet! LOL And there are other grounds to play on.... It takes much longer to rebuild a brewery to get it just right, and the storehouses... OMG, not the reserves!!! Beer shortage - the horror, the HORROR!!

Green and Maddy - so funny! I'm originally from West Virginia. Let Galactor or Spectra land there and learn the true meaning of 'Deliverance' (although the movie actually took place in Georgia).

WRITE THOSE!!!!!

Oh, Madilyn... UW has her scary face on and is looking at you...

: hides behind couch with Green: But I has this little thing called Generations I have to get on with, before people come after me with big hitty sticks!

:pushes Madilyn out: You've already started - you have a list! That's practically a planned fic, right there! I, on the other hand, would have to actually think of an idea and then that would require research and maps and stuff...

Actually to let you both off the hook .... I was thinking UW was referring to Becky and her West Virginia plot. But that was just me, maybe not what she had intended or what the rest of the board was thinking. And since you mention it Maddy .... can I be the first in line with the big stick, a few Shuriken and maybe a yoyo to get you going on that Generations Fic? Either that or Bruise.

I interpreted UWs push as towards me. I'm thinking about it...

For the pair of you. What is a 'drop bear'? I take it that it lives in trees and has claws. BTW: on tvtropes dot org, under the heading 'Everything Trying to Kill You', under 'Real Life' (in examples of the trope), is -- AUSTRALIA. And a lot of Aussie tropers weighing in with their knowledge of the local wildlife. Aussie goon to fellow goons: 'We stay inside at all times, mates.' Fellow goons respond with variations of 'Why?' and 'What could hurt us in here?' Bull ants attack. (This is where Katse gets the idea for 'A Swarm of Robot Ants.') It all goes downhill for them from there. Goon from West Virginia: "Stay in the mecha, y'all." Other goons respond with version of, "Oh, come on! Don't try to spook us with nonsense!" (They think the redneck reputation of WV is overblown.) Three hours later... Someone in WV has a bitchin' new monster truck!

A drop bear is a relative of the Koala. They look exactly lika Koala's, but have come up with their own technique of protecting their trees and families. Drop bears have developed a unique technique where they sit in their gum trees, looking cuddly and innocent. When the unsuspecting animal/human comes along and stands under their tree, the drop bears turn themselves into furry cannonballs and drop from their high branches onto the heads of those below. The weight and force of the drop bear usually results in the dropee being stunned and collapsing to the ground. The drop bear then grunts and re-climbs the tree to lie in wait for their next victim. It has been found that Australian victims of the drop bears can be revived with copious quantites of Australian beer, under the influence of which they can recall in minute detail their encounter and feel the urge to relate this to all and sundry. For some reason, however, the beer revival does not work on foreign tourists, and they remain forever in denial about their attack by a drop bear. Cloud - I have started chapter 10 of Generations - which is from the point of view of Chris and Vivian. As for Bruise - anybody would think you people want Bird-Smut!

Originally posted by Madilayn As for Bruise - anybody would think you people want Bird-Smut!

Of course we do! And that is such an appropriate smilie here!

Originally posted by UnpublishedWriter Goon from West Virginia: "Stay in the mecha, y'all." Other goons respond with version of, "Oh, come on! Don't try to spook us with nonsense!" (They think the redneck reputation of WV is overblown.) Three hours later... Someone in WV has a bitchin' new monster truck!

OMG!!! That's hysterical. I was thinking something like- WV guy - Paw, what are we gonna do with these green guys? Paw - Give 'em to your sisters. They need some new toys.

Well, I didn't want to offend with a stereotype. Of course, someone still gets a bitchin' new monster truck. It used to be a mecha. Heh. (Imagine reaction of ISO personnel when a truck full of WV guys, with a Galactor logo, drives by.)

NOW that's a fic I want to read!!!!

Originally posted by UnpublishedWriter Well, I didn't want to offend with a stereotype. Of course, someone still gets a bitchin' new monster truck. It used to be a mecha. Heh. (Imagine reaction of ISO personnel when a truck full of WV guys, with a Galactor logo, drives by.)

And they tell the team as it arrives 'No problem. We took care of the trash.'

Today I got to enjoy the Great Aussie summer!!! Out were I live the temp topped around 43celcius today. (109.4F)

Wow. That's hot. It hasn't gotten that hot in the DC area for a few years.

As a kid, all I had to worry about was passing cars and the strangers who might snatch me...

We got those warnings too, TJ. It's funny to me how many of you have responded to this thread. For us these creepy crawlies are just part of the landscape that we grew up being aware of. Don't touch spiders, leave snakes alone, listen out for shark warnings when swimming... It's just the same to me as don't pat unknown dogs and don't take lollies from strangers. It's what you're used to, I guess.

This thread seems to the perfect place for this... It's time to fire up the barbie, get out the prawns and pop the tops off various brands of beer! May your steaks be grilled to prefection, the potato salad fly free, the beer cold and old uncle Henry asleep before he starts on about 'kids in my day...' HAPPY AUSTRALIA DAY to all native, ex-pat and adopted Aussie Gatchamaniacs!

Enjoy your holiday, my Aussie friends!

Thanks, Springie. It's been a bloody hot Australia day over here.

I hope everyone celebrating has a great Australia Day!

Originally posted by Springie Enjoy your holiday, my Aussie friends!

I want to be in nice, warm Australia!! Happy Australia Day!

I don't know if I'm late but a very happy Australia Day to all my Australian friends!