*dons newsreader glasses and serious look* Here is the news:- A worrying trend seems to have developed in the frisking area of Gatch. Complaints are being aired by new enthusiastic members about the lack of use of certain items during their frisking sessions. One such Newbie was heard to say "I wanted rubber gloves and vaseline" Other newbies scared by this worrying trend have been afraid to come out of hiding and extend a hand in welcome. We now go to our roving reporter... (cameras cut to the frisking room) I am here looking as you can see at the vast array of equipment available for use for frisking the newbies to ensure they are suitably scared ....erm ... welcomed to Gatchamania. As you can see there are many frisking tools to choose from. The room is currently empty as it was fumigated earlier. I now return you to the studio. (back to studio) Well you decide people is this a worrying new trend or just luring people into a false sense of security. Thats all for now but we will stay with this story for a while

I see you have the egg whisk and warm celery on hand...

*whistles innocently at Meridian, hiding the evidence* Who me? Sweet little ol' innocent me?

10.... brow arches imperceptibly..... 9....... jaw muscle twitches 8....... pushes off wall of this thread after reading this a second time... 7........... eyes narrow ever so slightly with intent... 6......... Marks target as he approaches the newsdesk.... 5....... Ignores confused looks and blinks from camera crew frantically signalling that Firebird is still on air... 4...... Saunters casually over to the newsdesk..breaking into a slow smirk.. 3....... bends down next to Firebird at face level..and takes off her glasses neatly folding them, prying whisk and celery from her , smirk deepening .. 2........ Dont know nor care what other welcoming members use..but it seems youve forgotten , THIS condor doesnt need nor use ANY implements or other aids when it comes to Frisking newbies..Allow me to remind you what I DO use Once inside that Frisking room..silkily drawls out... 1......... Hard grins as he suddenly yanks Firebird out of her chair and over his shoulder to the sound gasps of the filming crew, stunned to the spot as they watch him striding towrds the Frisking room...kicking door shut..locking them in there for the next four hours...

drags Imi back into the frisking room for four weeks Can see why these poor newbies have cause to complain when you have no stamina Imi

St...ST...STAMINA???!!!!! Gloves are Off Sprite!!!... AAAAAAAARRGGHHHHH!!!! *POUNCES..KNOCKING THEM BOTH TO THE GROUND...* eep..

Ooh IMI more playtime!!!!! rolls around on the floor getting in some gropes WOOHOO!!!!!!!!!

*watches the chaos from the frisking room door, still unlocked from Imi's leaving* Ah...things are finally the way they're supposed to be. So nice.

Ah if you cant beat 'em ..join em I say... WHOO!!!!..

very true!! Anyone else want to play frisking with Imi and FB?

No use running from FB Elvin...shell get you sooner or later..

Imi is right I almost get my prey .....erm person

Ah, but running makes the catching all the more fun, right? So I shall continue, so long as my lungs don't pop. *Elvin's lungs pop* Oh drat...

Good thing I came by with the vidoe camera, we wouldn't want anyone to miss this! *grin*

*grabs Ashke into the group frisking session with Imi and Elvin* Ha!!! See what happens when you think you can just watch Frisking is a non spectator sport

The more the merrier eh? think the Woodstock people knew what they were talking about with Group LUUUURVE... "All we are Saaaaaying..is give Frisk a chance"...*starts singing , warping poor John lennons words , donning his glasses, grinning and diving back into Group Frisk.. WOO!

*sighs* I really have to find some normal people to hang out with. Im such a sweet, innocent, charming, shy, innocent, caring person that you guys are gonna end up corrupting me! (Did I mention innocent?)

grin .. at least twice, Ashke. man. .. where the hell's Siren when you need her? because i am refusing to be den mother in the middle of the usual chaos that is this place.

Pssh. If you're here, Ashke, it's a very strong sign that you are *anything* but innocent. Maybe you're mistaking yourself with your kid? What's the age of innocence supposed to be? I know *I'm* past it.

Innocence ends as soon as they start school! My kid is an expert at manipulating people by crying, It really drives me nuts!

If you've been corrupted, it's your own fault for watching whatever turned up on that video camera you've been waving around. Was there a double entendre in that sentence? I just can't tell any more.